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Ah, see what you're getting at. No, I did a google search and the fact he was born in Scotland of Irish descent was the first couple of lines shown on the search results page. Didn't delve deeper until your post and realised he played for the Jocks.

What exactly am I fishing for?

Not sure who he played for but according to Wiki, scottish born of irish origin.

Well we don't know for sure that he was smashed but bearing in mind the team he idolises just beat their main rivals in the last minute in dramatic circumstances, we can surmise that he had had quite a few sherberts the previous night and possibly well into the small hours. That coupled with...

Now that is a prank phone call if ever I heard one. Someone impersonating an ex Man Utd player and making him sound drunk and appear stupid. At least for the sake of Crerands future appearance fees, I hope that the case. Having said that, it's not the first time I've heard drivel from him so...