[Misc] Is having kids more hassle than it's worth?

[Mustafa II]

Until fairly recently, I have always wanted children... Until my friends started having them, anyway.

Turns out they're just annoying younger people you need to keep around a lot of the time, and are very expensive. They're very time consuming, quite stressful... or very stressful. A lot of hard-work, while giving very little back.

I have seen there are some benefits - such as pride, entertainment and a new self-worth that emerges through parenthood.

But overall, having children seems like a bit of a life-sentence, starting from the day they are born... with no guarantee that they will grow into decent, loving people that will repay what you have invested in them. In fact it seems very rare that they ever do.

Is it better to just live your life, rather than reproducing little versions of yourself that effectively ruin your life as you know it?

 

[Wrong-Direction]

This thread could be life defining

 

[JBizzle]

If you're viewing having kids through the lens of them justifying and/or repaying the financial outlay, it probably isn't for you

 

[Whoislloydy]

Have you tried babysitting? Now do that for a minimum of 18 years

 

[Rodney Thomas]

After seeing some of your flounces, Mustafa, I'd say you aren't ready for kids anyway.

 

[South Stand Bonfire]

The only time I have questioned having a child was when my daughter was 17/18 and started to beat me in swimming races on holiday. In seriousness, it’s all down to individuals’ choices. Having been widowed when relatively young, I wasn’t expecting to remarry and have children and don’t ever regret getting the second chance and I have both now.,

 

[POSKETT AT THE VALLEY]

The bottom line is that we were put on this earth to have children. I have four and wouldn’t want to change a thing.

 

[Berty23]

If people stop having kids then we are screwed as a population! That said…

I always wanted kids and love it. It is very hard at times but very rewarding at others. It has given me emotional highs and lows that are different to anything I had from my own existence. I don’t like the constant worrying and knowing they will be doing crap they should not - especially some of the stuff that happens with tech (which was not a thing when I was a kid), but the good times are great.

They do however cost me lots. They take over my life to the extent that I will be needing new hobbies in the next few years.

My kids are 16 year old lad who is bright but simply doesn’t put in the work. Wants to be a pro golfer but again doesn’t put in the work. And I have 14 year old twin daughters who are currently causing me all sorts of grief. Looking forward to them coming out the other side.

I would recommend to people that if you want have kids then have them and enjoy it. But if you are not sure then they are a huge commitment and take over your life so think very hard about it. If people don’t have kids then I don’t want them moaning about too many immigrants in 20 years!

 

[Greg Bobkin]

Until fairly recently, I have always wanted children... Until my friends started having them, anyway.

Turns out they're just annoying younger people you need to keep around a lot of the time, and are very expensive. They're very time consuming, quite stressful... or very stressful. A lot of hard-work, while giving very little back.

I have seen there are some benefits - such as pride, entertainment and a new self-worth that emerges through parenthood.

But overall, having children seems like a bit of a life-sentence, starting from the day they are born... with no guarantee that they will grow into decent, loving people that will repay what you have invested in them. In fact it seems very rare that they ever do.

Is it better to just live your life, rather than reproducing little versions of yourself that effectively ruin your life as you know it?

I don't mean to be rude but, judging by that post, parenthood very much isn't for you.

Me? Very much worth the 'hassle' and I wouldn't change it for anything. Mrs Bobkin and the Bobkin Jnrs are my absolute world. Yes, of course it's hard work, but they are amazing human beings who bring me joy every single day.

 

[POSKETT AT THE VALLEY]

If people stop having kids then we are screwed as a population! That said…

I always wanted kids and love it. It is very hard at times but very rewarding at others. It has given me emotional highs and lows that are different to anything I had from my own existence. I don’t like the constant worrying and knowing they will be doing crap they should not - especially some of the stuff that happens with tech (which was not a thing when I was a kid), but the good times are great.

They do however cost me lots. They take over my life to the extent that I will be needing new hobbies in the next few years.

My kids are 16 year old lad who is bright but simply doesn’t put in the work. Wants to be a pro golfer but again doesn’t put in the work. And I have 14 year old twin daughters who are currently causing me all sorts of grief. Looking forward to them coming out the other side.

I would recommend to people that if you want have kids then have them and enjoy it. But if you are not sure then they are a huge commitment and take over your life so think very hard about it. If people don’t have kids then I don’t want them moaning about too many immigrants in 20 years!

Not necessarily given the number of small boat immigrants!

 

[Berty23]

Not necessarily given the number of small boat immigrants!

The current birth rate is less than 1.5 kids per woman isn’t it. You don’t need to be a brilliant mathematician to know that this means we will end up with an ageing population. The middle classes are struggling to afford kids. I don’t think a few people on a boat will make up the deficit tbh.

 

[schmunk]

The only time I have questioned having a child was when my daughter was 17/18 and started to beat me in swimming races on holiday. In seriousness, it’s all down to individuals’ choices. Having been widowed when relatively young, I wasn’t expecting to remarry and have children and don’t ever regret getting the second chance and I have both now.,

17/18? My son's been beating me at running since he was about 12.

(He has since sprinted for Sussex in county athletics)

Children are hard work, and very expensive, but - on occasion - can bring great joy, pride and affection.

 

[Sarisbury Seagull]

Best thing I’ve ever done and by far my proudest achievement.

 

[BadFish]

Given the tone and your apparent views in this I would say don't do it. For their sake.

For anyone else (and I hope this doesn't persuade the OP in any way). I have got to the age where my kids are late teens and early 20s and I not that's a few of my childless peers are regretting not having them (yeah when most of the hard work is done!!). Mainly though the lack of comfort as they age is behind this.

 

[GT49er]

They are a source of huge joy. Loved being there for their first steps, words, school, achievements and all the other wonderful things. And great pride in the way they've turned out.




Well, two out of three anyway...............................

 

[Reddleman]

Greatest thing I have ever done. I would do it all again tomorrow. Literally by a million miles the best thing that has ever happened to me.

 

[Ⓩ-Ⓐ-Ⓜ-Ⓞ-Ⓡ-Ⓐ]

Can’t imagine my life without my two boys. Aged 2 and 4 they certainly keep me busy but they are my absolute whole world!

 

[Bozza]

If you're interested in a "try before you buy", you're welcome to borrow mine.

I'll drop them round and then pick them up a few years later.

 

[tronnogull]

The wife and I have decided that we don't want children........ We're going to tell them on the weekend.....

 

[Wozza]

I've come to the conclusion, just recently, that I really don't want kids.

Just need to tell my wife. And my three boys. Boom-tish!

Edit: Spook - wrote at same time!