Profanisaurus-isms

[Lady Whistledown]

As it's Friday afternoon, I think we can be permitted at least one gratuitously juvenile thread.

So...your favourite Profanisaurus-isms?


"pushing a marshmallow into a piggy bank"

Describes the situation for a gentleman when, shall we say, the spirit is willing but the body unable

 

[Dave the OAP]

BOBFOC

Body off baywatch, face off Crimewatch

Stealth Moose.....

looks great from a distance, close up is a moose

 

[Titanic]

..."pushing a marshmallow into a piggy bank"

That just sounds like it would end up in a sticky mess.... oh, right.... I get it now

 

[Buzzer]

Decorating her face like a plasterer's radio

Grinning like a wanking jap

Larder lout

Sitting on the bog looking like a chinese wicketkeeper

A fanny like a split sofa

FITWI - I'd rather f*** it than wrestle it

Glasgow postman ie a thief

 

[Nibble]

carbon cockprint

The amount of CO2, greenhouse gases, fossil fuels and what-have-you produced, emitted and consumed by a chap in search of sexual gratification. 'What? You're going all the way to Stockholm just to shag that bird? Your carbon cockprint will be massive.'

 

[scooter1]

Doing the walrus

Just as you're about to blow your beans, stick it in her mouth - as you cum do a double karate chop on either side of her neck and watch as your gentleman juice comes flying out of both nostrils

 

[Munkfish]

Doing the walrus

Just as you're about to blow your beans, stick it in her mouth - as you cum do a double karate chop on either side of her neck and watch as your gentleman juice comes flying out of both nostrils

aka the red dragon

 

[Lady Whistledown]

Oh dear God :lolol

 

[Bevendean Hillbilly]

Captain Cavemans Nose (desc) The clitoris

Pirate of mens pants: either a gayer or the male member

An excellent theory Watsonexcl) said in response to another gentleman dropping an air biscuit, usually whilst stroking ones chin and smoking a pipe

A confident appeal by the Australians there: (see above) another riposte..see also:

"A bit more choke and she'll start"

"I love you too darling" etc etc.

 

[Buzzer]

Doing the walrus

Just as you're about to blow your beans, stick it in her mouth - as you cum do a double karate chop on either side of her neck and watch as your gentleman juice comes flying out of both nostrils

Or a kidney punch just as you pull out of a spot of anal creates a pleasing spectacle known as a pink sock.

I believe there's even pictures on the net attesting to this.

 

[Les Biehn]

The Cafetiere

To push a ladies head south under some resistence.

 

[Man of Harveys]

I have proudly taught my German cousins the poetically-beautiful term "the brown laser" for having a dose of the runny shits, and it's caught on a treat

 

[house your seagull]

anne franks drum kit (about as useful as...)

last hotdog in the tin (it was like the ...)

ken dodd's hairbrush (she had a fanny like ...)

 

[Lady Whistledown]

dance of the seven ales n.
Unbalanced, faux-seductive terpsichorean moves essayed in nightclubs by pissed revellers of either gender in a misguided attempt to secure some floor sweepings before the ugly lights come on.

 

[MattBackHome]

boil your eggs v.

To place your testicles over the anus of a farting naked woman that is standing on her head, for three minutes or so. A sexual practice that, if anyone has ever performed it, which let's face it is frankly unlikely, will undoubtedly have proved to be not worth the f***ing bother.

 

[Lady Whistledown]

Aslan n.

A woman with the hair of a lion, the face of a witch, and the body of a wardrobe

 

[Simster]

anne franks drum kit (about as useful as...)

f***ing excellent.

 

[house your seagull]

bishops rage - a vigorous/very quick wank

 

[looney]

Or a kidney punch just as you pull out of a spot of anal creates a pleasing spectacle known as a pink sock.

I believe there's even pictures on the net attesting to this.

A bit like a donkey punch?

Is'nt a sweaty betty whe a fat chick sits on your face?